Why Chickens?

I get it. I get the appeal of the whole SionChicken phenomenon when it comes to function. But I don’t get when it comes to the form.

Let’s face it they look like they are Playdough molded to resemble (loosely) chickens. They are ugly. I mean, if poultry had their own version of WTFug (probably be called WTBa-CAW!), they’d be plastered all over it. (I really should have put a picture of an actually SionChicken in this post, but then I’d totally be killing all potential giant cock jokes.)

As a whole, the SL community continues to gravitate towards the mundane when the fantastic is slightly to the right of it (my right, not yours). Why chickens? Is there a gene that gives people a deep-rooted desire to be chicken farmers that I simply lack?

And what really blows my mind is that Sion’s followup to the chickens is… corn! CORN!

I’d like to propose a list of animals I’d actually want to farm:

• Basking Sharks
• Wilson, the volleyball from Castaway
• Kiwis
• Yeti Crabs
• Chibi SLebreties

Duel with Darth Caustin

I’m a big nerd. If you haven’t figured that out yet. Let me repeat myself, I’m a big nerd.

One of the things I like to do in Second Life and it’s ancillary social networks is revel in my nerdyness. For example, to the left is my current avatar for Plurk. And if you know who this is, I want to be your friend.

This is Skorr. He’s the bounty hunter from Ord Mantell that Han mentions in The Empire Strikes Back. (Sehra says he has brain herpes. Which makes me laugh every time I think about it. I love they way that girl thinks.)

Do you know where you can find out more about Skorr? Wookiepedia. Yes, the Star Wars Wikipedia.

When I need a distraction or to defer boredom, I can sit and spend hours — hours — on that site, just looking up one obscure character/planet/battle/technology/alien/monster after another. The Star Wars universe is huge. So huge that there’s a dude who’s only job it is is to keep track of it all and fix continuity errors. I want that job.

Last week, I was feeling sorry for myself and decided that a little virtual retail therapy would do me some good. We picked Sehra up a new skin. But came up against a wall when it came to getting something I wanted. Clothes? Meh, I got plenty. New furniture? Meh, we’re running low on prims.

I briefly considered getting a car. A nice one. But then I figured it’d get about as much use as my sailboat. In other words, none  — and I live on a fucking island.

Then I remembered seeing some holocrons on Xstreet. What’s a holocron? Let’s ask Wookiepedia.

A holocron was a crystal-lattice device, in which the Jedi, as well as the Sith, of old stored phenomenal quantities of data, as well as the holocron’s gatekeeper. The Sith also had their own form of holocron technology, and they seem to predate the Jedi in using the technology by at least three thousand years.

Thanks, Wookiepedia!

This is the one I settled on. First of all, it’s a Sith holocron, which are pyramid shaped and far more visually interesting then the cubed Jedi variety. Plus you can turn it on ask it questions, the answers to which will be retrieved from Wookiepedia or Wikipedia. Neato!

Unfortunately, the texture work is terrible. It’s hard to notice from this angle, but any other angle is blindingly obvious. And the problem? Photo-sourcing.

The designer, who we will assume has permission to use the image, obviously didn’t notice that this picture has depth. And you need to take that into account when taking a texture from a 3D object and applying it a flat surface.

I must admit I felt duped. Both Sehra and I thought it looked pretty cool in the Xstreet image but was a complete eyesore in world. So I cracked my knuckles and loaded up photoshop to produce this:

Daila, JB, Hawks and Billy. This is why I was being such an anti-social tit that day. Darth Caustin appreciates your patience. And trust me, you don’t want to get on his bad side.

And just to end this post as awkwardly as possible. If anyone has any recommendations for Star Wars roleplay areas that have people roleplaying on them, lemme know. I’m not having any luck.